Where Laughter Meets Lunacy

I have no reason to be, but I am extremely agitated today:/ I get this way every once in a while for no apparent reason. I’m going to start tracking it on a calendar and see if there is any pattern. This really has got to stop, I feel like a dragon with fire coming out of my eyes and mouth. I’m so cranky even food isn’t helping, never a good thing. I thought about going shopping, but I should probably wait until I actually get my first paycheck, heh. Also leaving the house poses the problem of outside sources making my mood even worse. Right now I am listening to Pandora and crocheting a baby hat to match the cute booties I made for the newest arrival on it’s way to the family (not mine of course). Back to playing with yarn in hopes this mood swing will pass quickly, I’m sure Dave would like that also.

I got to speak with someone from the company I was “hired” on with today and it’s official. I have a job! With all the wishy washy background check stuff from that outside company I was beginning to worry a little. The lady is going to call me this weekend or Monday to let me know how much I will be making. *crosses fingers for much monies* ;P Then I just need to go in and get my picture taken before training starts on March 24th so my badge will be ready when I start! We also got the refund check from Qwest for our last cell phone bill and the mail-in rebate cards back from t-mobile for our new phones today. Friday the 13th FTW! I’m one of those weird people that thinks 13 is a lucky number. I’m thinking a lottery ticket purchase is in order today:D

So Dave was doing his morning reading online this morning and comes across this lovely information. Apparently since Oregon (and everywhere else in the world) is having some monetary issues they decided to let some prisoners out. Alright, nothing new there, but here’s the best part! They are paying for their housing when they release them! So much for saving money! Why is it always the people high up that get paid too much that have no common sense? If this world was run by poor blue collar workers we’d probably be much better off.

So I was watching some home shows on Hulu today. I felt the need to build a house, or do some landscaping, or something house related. Well since I don’t have a house to do any of those things with, or the funds to create one, naturally I went to dig up the ol’ Sims 2 discs to install the game and expansions and have at it. But could anything be that easy, of course not! I don’t know if it’s Vista’s fault, or EA’s, I’d have to say at this point a little of both. I managed to get the Sims 2 installed, but can’t install any of the expansions. Ok, fine, so I’ll just have less design options for a house, no big deal. So I go to open just the plain ol’ Sims 2 program. Won’t fucking run! I get a window saying there is known issues with this version (Vista 64 bit) of windows. So I do the google thing and after a bit of reading I hear patching the game will solve all the problems of the world the problem. So I download the patch for Sims 2 DVD edition, even though half the errors I got on trying to install the expansions were because the game wouldn’t patch. I try to run the patch, that won’t work either. I do more reading, other people running Vista are happily playing their Sims 2 game while patiently waiting for EA to stop being losers and release the Sims 3 already, haven’t we been waiting long enough!?!? I’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps it’s just Vista 64 bit that is having issues with the Sims 2. I’d love to ask some of those people who are happily playing their game which version of Vista they are running, but judging by some of the things they are saying they are probably too stupid to even know. So here I am, not tired, dying to build a house, and all I have are LEGOs, too bad they are outside in the garage and it’s too late/cold/wet to go outside and get them:/ I plan on digging deeper into this issue tomorrow when I’ve had more time to read and experiment with things. It is possible that half my problems are caused by EA’s ridiculously stupid, out of control copy protection bullshit they are using on all their games. You know, the ones that force people to illegally download disk images of games and use no-cd cracks and all that jazz to actually be able to install and run the fucking things. Bastards. I bought these games, have all the packaging, and the serial numbers, go die in a fire for not letting me pop my disk in and get the game running. Seriously. DIAF! I very badly want to pre-order the Sims 3 collector’s edition, but if I can’t install and run the game without a huge hassle, you can take that 2 GB THE SIMS PLUMBOB™ USB DRIVE and shove it up your ass.

Getting through the background check for my new job is more difficult that the interview! Every background check I’ve had before has been easy, you sign the release form, and that’s it, they do their check, everyone is happy. But not this company! The place I am going to be working (hopefully!?!?) goes through an outside company for their background checks, and I’m getting the feeling this company is a bit on the lazy side. So far I’ve had to scan and send them old w-2s, pay stubs, G.E.D., and also another copy of the signed release (which I already filled out at the time I was told I was hired). Luckily so far I’ve had all the information they needed, just had to dig around for some of it. This is day two of information requests, I’m wondering what they will want next. All I have left is my birth certificate, marriage certificate, and my social security card, hopefully they won’t ask for anything else! I thought about sending them all now, before they ask for anything else, but I’m sure they’d get confused and just ask for it all again:/ Hopefully they will get their shit together soon so we can move this process along, I’ve never experienced a hassle like this before with a simple background check.

I finally got a job! After nearly a year of being back in Oregon and countless applications, resumes, and interviews I’ve finally landed a job. I’ll be doing customer service at a call center. I am very excited and of course nervous. I hope I didn’t freak out the people that hired me, I couldn’t help but have a few tears in my eyes when they said they were going to hire me. Hopefully we can finally get back on our feet and on our way to where we want to be in life. And health insurance, oh sweet health insurance how I’ve missed you. I don’t even know any details about anything, but I don’t care, anything is better than the nothing I am contributing now. I hope it’s not too hard on Dash having me gone, he’s gotten so spoiled with me being home all the time. I told him and Abby they have to be nice to each other while I’m gone, I’m sure that will happen…

It’s been so long since I’ve logged into my blog I’m amazed I even remembered the correct password on the first try. I am trying to stay semi-positive about life but sometimes it is harder than others. I know I really don’t have any right to complain, I am a lot better off than some people, still, it’s hard sometimes. I have a wonderful husband, two great cats, despite the fact they are moody and downright cantankerous (I don’t usual use those big fancy words, but it’s a fun one) at times. I have a loving, supportive family, and a great dad who is currently supporting me and previously mentioned wonderful husband and cantankerous cat children. I am not normally the type of person to ask for help or have others take care of me, so this past year has been very difficult for me to deal with. I am so very thankful for my dad taking us all in and taking care of us, but at the same time I feel like a horrible useless freeloader. I have been applying for job after job, all of which I am more than qualified for, but have yet to land anything. I try to avoid the jobs closely linked with family members just because I don’t know how long we will be here and I don’t want to let anyone down if we decide to up and move away in the near future. People keep telling me it’s just the economy but at times it’s hard not to think maybe I just suck somehow and no one wants me. I have literally been blown off by two companies now, it gets to the point where they just don’t return calls.  So here I sit, on another cold cloudy Oregon morning, sitting in front on my computer with tears running down my face. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I have just finished another online application, maybe this one will be the one. I also wonder sometimes if maybe my aunt and uncle are right, maybe this inability to land a job is a sign that we just shouldn’t be here, we need to get out of the valley and start fresh somewhere new. Everyone knows we don’t want to live here forever, we had just hoped to be able to save up and plan for our next move, unlike the last one where we fled like murder witnesses just to make it out alive. Come this June Dave and I will have been married for 3 years. It’s been a non-stop roller coaster ride of joy and heartache. Unlike most some couples the heartache doesn’t come from our relationship though, it’s all from non-marital sources. I don’t think I could have survived these last few years without Dave, he helps keep me sane and doesn’t let me forget that everything will be fine someday, we just have to make it through these rough patches of road. When I am bored and down I look at houses for sale online and dream of one day having a house of our very own for the cats to play in, and hopefully human children as well someday. I haven’t quite decided if this is good or not, it does inspire me to get there, but also depresses me because we are far from there. Sometimes Most of the time I just want to run away and start over somewhere new, but then I feel bad for the family I would be leaving behind. I appreciate all they have down for us and I would miss them so much, but I just want a fresh start, a new place where the bad memories of various parts of my past might stop haunting me. Not to say there aren’t any good memories here, it’s just the bad ones are the ones that forever haunt me in my nightmares. I just want us to be happy. And I don’t want to be a burden to the people I love. Reading one plus two inspires me to up and take off, but then I remind myself that her move was long thought out and well planned, I would just be flying by the seat of my pants, something I have been doing a lot of lately though I suppose.  I listen to this song way too much also. I mean hell, we’ve already up and ran off to try and start over once, of course that was a truly horrific experience, but wherever we choose to go next can’t possibly be as awful as that whole thing was. *knocks on wood* At least I got to meet a few great people down there in CA, although not the ones I expected. Well I’ve been up for a few hours now and have yet to make it more than 3 feet from the bed so I suppose I will end this here for now and go make some tea, hit the shower, etc. Maybe I will  have an epiphany in the shower and all answers for what to do in life will come rushing into my poor, tired, scrambled brain, heh.