Where Laughter Meets Lunacy

I’ve know this to be true for quite some time now. But today is the first day in a while I’ve been so frustrated, angry and upset I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry, so naturally, I did both. I desperetely need Valium! It wasn’t just one thing that happened and then I freaked out a little and got over it. No, it was the entire damn day that sucked monkey nuts. Even when I was laughing with my friends I still felt the urge to completely flip out and start throwing things, like a small child throwing a tantrum. I’m not even sure why. Ok, so I had a nightmare that was work related. Well, that happens more often than not, so nothing new there. Yes, I felt horribly tired when I woke up and just wanted to never get out of bed. Again, really not a new occurance. I hate feeling like this, but what I hate even more is not knowing why I am feeling this way. Nothing new that hasn’t been happening everyday for a while is going on, so, WHAT  THE  FUCK?!?! I’ll tell you what, as soon as that health insurance kicks in (assuming I haven’t been fired yet) I’m finding a damn doctor that will give me some Valium for days like this. I can’t stand feeling like there is molten lava spewing out of my eyes and mouth and anyone that crosses my path is going to get burned. I’m talking third degree here ok, serious business.

I have no reason to be, but I am extremely agitated today:/ I get this way every once in a while for no apparent reason. I’m going to start tracking it on a calendar and see if there is any pattern. This really has got to stop, I feel like a dragon with fire coming out of my eyes and mouth. I’m so cranky even food isn’t helping, never a good thing. I thought about going shopping, but I should probably wait until I actually get my first paycheck, heh. Also leaving the house poses the problem of outside sources making my mood even worse. Right now I am listening to Pandora and crocheting a baby hat to match the cute booties I made for the newest arrival on it’s way to the family (not mine of course). Back to playing with yarn in hopes this mood swing will pass quickly, I’m sure Dave would like that also.